I still haven’t taken that damn test yet. I am slowly trying to ingrain it in my brain that there is a little bleep there, what else could be causing all these symptoms? I also recalculated a little and according to my calculations I should have actually gotten my visit from Aunt Flo on the 6th not the 12th.. this is day 28 of the cycle and nothing but boob pains 😛
So, what happens now if there is a Bleep? Do I completely cut out the people that stress me out or irritate me? or do I just cut back on how often I see them? After all lets face it, some of these people are not people I will want little Bleep to be around once s/he is born. Too much drama, partiers, and just all around terrible role models! Wow, I have some “cool” friends huh? It doesn’t matter I have a feeling only a handful if that will visit us after bleep is born, another portion will want me to watch their kids all day since I will with-out-a-doubt be home all day with bleep, and the rest of them won’t talk to me again until they decide to have a baby of their own and will want advice. The only people right now that I even want to talk to about it are my friends that have babies, are trying to have babies, and family. I mean, don’t get me wrong I would like to talk to my other friends about it, but they aren’t actually interested in hearing about it, so, what else do I talk about when this is the ONLY thing I can think about?
Okay so, what else is next? do I want to know the sex? or do I want to wait? What are david’s real thoughts about it? Can we honestly afford it now? It doesn’t really matter we will have to make it work… when do I go to the doctor? how will I pay doctor bills? will they even accept me without insurance? will we make a payment plan? when will we move? Can we move before I’m too big to help? We will have to move if I’m pregnant, we will need to be closer to David’s work.. will david see we will need a garage or 3 bedrooms? in the new place? there is going to be so much stuff for bleep, and we will more than likely still have the cats. I would love to give joe back to the family who had him.. he pees everywhere, but I couldn’t get rid of my marley moo I thought about it so many times, seeing if my mom would keep her she’s a tiny little cat and so loving my mom would love her, but she’s my little cuddle bug and out of the two cats, she’s the one that’s going to get used to shelby.
I don’t know I just can’t stop thinking right now.. well my friend just called and she has 3 kids maybe she can help me sort this out.
to be continued….